perished hope.
I GIVE UP. i really want to. someone shoot me, i feel like i'm floating to a different world. why does it seem that in every decision i make, i have to make a certain sacrifice?!
Everything has been a facade, when i thought this was this and that was that. everything ain't so simple as ABC. i've learnt so much and i mean really loads. Now i've seen clearly who actually means to me. who.
i held on to that piny (puny+tiny) hope i had and everything else for you. i feel like a failure. i can't get hold of my emotions and i'm tearing myself apart. ALL i hold are pure memories, hopefully i'll never let them go. i spare a thought for you in everything and what do i get? hurts. i try so hard yet nothing gets out of it. i'm useless.
so much tears of mine have flowed. i can't stop crying. everything i portray to you people is a lie, i'm so weak. i think i suck, seriously.
can someone who loves me just give me a hug now? i badly need it.
today, i really gotta say this.
thanks CHARLES. you don't know how much of a blessing you have been to me (i hope you are reading this). I've never met someone like you, so extraordinary. you were always there for me when i needed comfort and a friend to talk. you never failed to cheer me up and your presence is always appreciated. sometimes i really don't know how to tell you how much you mattered to me. but this is how i'd say it. i want to let the whole WORLD know you are a great friend and continue to be to many others..
thanks MICHELLE and MAVIS. you two are my bestest classmates ever. thanks for always being so sensitive to me and yeah, you two are great! always cheering me on! =)
now, i'm just going to numb myself. i need not you.
stop the fucking pain.