Tell me why.
Spiderman II showing on TV. I think I have watched it an umpteenth time but still, the story just does not want to dwell up there.
Today was SOCCER FINALS! It was exciting ttm. Haha, all the action. Cool (: the awesome match today has made me like watching soccer more :) I think the guys were good, and the spirit at the end of the match and prize presentation was awesome many many too.
Today my phone agitated and angered me. It hanged in the middle of Chem lecture and all that hanging drained my battery level from 50% to 4%. Stupid phone, made me phoneless for a day, what insecurity.
Today I pondered about stuff again. This mind of mine seems to be always wondering these days. I want to sum all these insecurities up, but I can't seem to be able to do so. Stuff that I never questioned in the past, emotions I haven't felt in a long while (or have been refraining to do so). Ahh. SAM TAN never reply my message, I sad, scared I said something wrong to him :O :(
Those scenes of that cold room is flashing in my mind again. WHY. God, take this pain away. That room, so crowded but so omgosh, how do I go on, I miss you v v v much.
"my children will never get to see their grandmother, chinese new year will be spent without mum, she will never see me graduate and i wouldn't have the chance of giving her a portion of my first pay. and you know, i'm only 19 now, not even an adult or earning wages. my brothers are 15. its worse because i actually think so much of the consequent life ahead. i'm still a kid."
This always makes me cry, and this post was left on korkor's blog for a month? Everytime I go there, I tear, I lose control, lose control of all I have reserved for the innerself to withstand. Sometimes, I go there unknowingly too, even though it serves as a painful reminder of her departure and I know it will make me upset, but I don't know, I guess I needed a release.
Where are you, when I really need you, friend.